Judge Goomba
by birby6
Summary: All rise for the favorable Judge Goomba! He is always fair with his decisions...most of the time. Feel free to submit your own cases in a review!


Judge Goomba

Case 1: Mystery of the beating

Eyeless Goomba: OVERRULED!

Birby6: We haven't even started the case yet.

Eyeless Goomba: Sorry, I just want that THING jailed!

Ella: I hope you're talking about yourself, because if you're talking about me, you will feel EXTREME pain in the morning.

(Goombario comes in wearing a bailiff's suit)

Ella: Why are some of the worst Goombas here?

Goombario: Hey, I got these on sale!

Ella: Makes you look like a clown.

Goombario: Does not!

(A circus ringmaster comes in and points to Goombario)

Ringmaster: There he is! That's our runaway clown!

Goombario: Wait, I'm not a…

(Before he has a chance to explain, tons of circus freaks come in and take Goombario away)

Birby6: Great, now I need a new bailiff!

(He gets out his computer, goes to the "Bailiffs R Us" website, and orders one. In comes…)

Gourmet Guy: I'm here!

Birby6: You're not even in your suit!

Gourmet Guy: It caught on fire. Luckily I escaped before I ate more spicy curry.

Birby6: Well, since you don't have a suit, you will wear this trash can.

(One falls from the ceiling and lands over Gourmet Guy's head)

Eyeless Goomba: LET'S JUST GET GOING WITH THE TRIAL!

Birby6: Fine then. Gourmet Guy, proceed.

(He goes up facing a wall)

Gourmet Guy: All rise for the…

Birby6: Wrong way.

Gourmet Guy: Sorry, it's hard to see with this trash can on me!

(He turns the other way)

Gourmet Guy: ALL RISE FOR THE FAVORABLE JUDGE GOOMBA!

(Everyone rises for birby6)

Birby6: I win! You didn't say Simon says!

Eyeless Goomba: I didn't know we were playing that game!

Birby6: We were. You must ALWAYS be prepared to play.

Blueytroopa: Weren't we supposed to be doing a trial?

Birby6: But I already beat all one hundred of them!

Toad (jury): SHE MEANT THE TROUBLE OF ELLA AND THE EYELESS GOOMBA!

Birby6: Oh, that too. What's the problem?

Eyeless Goomba: You know Ella keeps beating me up? Today, she dropped me in a pit of acid with a huge Unagi, gave me a big wedgie, made me watch a horrible TV station, and to top it all off, cut my legs off!

Birby6: You have your legs now.

Eyeless Goomba: The doctor sewed them back on once I called the police.

Birby6: By the way, what was that TV channel?

Eyeless Goomba: Total Nonstop Action Wrestling.

Birby6: OH MY GOSH, THAT'S EVIL! Eyeless Goomba wins the trial!

Gourmet Guy: But you didn't even ask Ella's side of the story!

Birby6: Who cares? The faster we get done with this, the faster I will get to the fast food joint down the street.

(Ella gets up)

Ella: I will get to tell my side of the story, because if I don't, this place will go BOOM.

Birby6: Dang it, I just paid for this courthouse! Fine, present your case!

Blueytroopa: Gladly!

(Nothing happens)

Birby6: What, no joke?

Gourmet Guy: It appears the joke you were going to use was so old, that it died.

Birby6: Jokes die?

Gourmet Guy: Duh!

Birby6: So that's what happened to the "Over 9000" joke!

Toad (jury): THE CASE YOU MORON!

Birby6: Okay, fine!

(Blueytroopa clears her throat)

Blueytroopa: Ella didn't do it because Roy was there with her!

(Everyone gasps)

DUN DUN DUN!  
Birby6: Where did that come from?

Gourmet Guy: Didn't you hire a sound effects person to play those at epic moments?

Birby6: Oh yeah! It makes the case more interesting.

(He notices Gourmet Guy is facing the wrong way)

Birby6: I'm over here.

Gourmet Guy: I would've known that if there wasn't SUPER GLUE in this trash can!

Blueytroopa: Um, back to the case?

Birby6: Oh, that case has nice lavender on it.

Toad (jury): NOT THAT CASE!

Birby6: Why didn't you say so?

(Toad starts banging his head on the table)

Birby6: Blueytroopa said apparently Roy was with her, is that true?

Eyeless Goomba: Absolutely not! He wasn't there at all!

Blueytroopa: Yes he was! You just couldn't see him!

(The two start arguing, then birby6 starts banging his hammer)

Birby6: ORDER IN THE COURT!

(Nothing happens)

Birby6: Let me guess, that joke died too?

Gourmet Guy: That joke died AGES ago!

Birby6: Dang, I guess I'll have to get another one!

(He gets a bucket out of thin air, reaches inside, and pulls out a slip of paper)

Birby6: Oh, here's a good one. "Did you hear about the guy who…"

Toad (jury): THE CASE!

Birby6: Fine, fine, but we'll need witnesses for this.

Eyeless Goomba: I'll go first. I call POPPLE to the stand!

(A vortex pops up dropping Popplein the stand)

Birby6 (holding a remote): Aren't I a stinker?

Popple: Hey, what am I doing here? I was robbing a big bank see?

Birby6: To put it simple, you're in court.

Popple: Dang it, did I get arrested again?

Birby6: No, you're just simply a witness to this case against the Eyeless Goomba and Ella.

Popple: Oh, that's good see? By the way, I never remember you being a judge.

Birby6: I got my judge's license this morning.

Toad (jury): DO I EVEN NEED TO SAY IT?

(Popple throws a hammer at Toad)

Popple: I think he's going insane see?

Birby6: We don't mind. Eyeless Goomba, proceed.

Eyeless Goomba: Thank you, your honor.

Birby6: I prefer Overlord.

(Eyeless Goomba ignores that and goes up to Popple)

Eyeless Goomba: Popple, what's e=mc2?

Popple: How should I know?

Eyeless Goomba: LIAR!

(Eyeless Goomba throws a brick at Popple)

Birby6: No violence in the building! Where's the bailiff to break them up?

Gourmet Guy: Over here!

Birby6: You're near a tree.

Gourmet Guy: IF ONLY I COULD SEE!

Birby6: Well, it seems you're not fit for a trash can, so I'll have to use something else, A DUMPSTER!

(A dumpster falls from the sky and lands on him)

Toad (jury): CASE, CASE, CASE, CASE!

(A brick falls on Toad)

Popple: Well then, let's get back on topic see? I did see Ella with Roy…

Ella: HA! IN YOU'RE FACE, EYELESS GOOMBA!

Popple: I'm not finished. Roy was with her, but he had weird spots on his head, see? I do not recall Roy having those before.

Birby6: Maybe he had chicken pox?  
Popple: That disease doesn't exist here, see?

Birby6: Interesting…

Ella: You honor…

Birby6: OVERLORD!

Ella: Don't push it. If I could add something, Roy was acting strange to me. He came up with all those ideas to torture the Eyeless Goomba, and since I like torturing the Eyeless Goomba, I did those things.

Birby6: Whoa, this is a big find. Usually Roy wouldn't be so devious like that, he usually beats people up or electrocutes them. To make it even more confusing, why would Roy go after the Eyeless Goomba? He's usually beating up his other siblings.

Ella: I'll find out! I call Larry to the stands!

(A catapult comes from under Popple and sends him to the guest chairs. Then a portal opens up and dumps Larry into the stand)

Larry: What the heck, where am I?

Birby6: A courthouse.

Larry: NOOOOO! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!

Birby6: You're a witness.

Larry: Oh, that's better.

Birby6: Ella, proceed.

Ella: Gladly.

(She goes up to Larry)

Ella: Where were you last week?

Larry: Getting beat up by Roy, as usual.

Ella: Odd, Roy was with me at the time as well. Did he have any spots on him?

Larry: Spots? None at all! In fact, I took a picture before he was about to do a huge beating on me!

(He hands birby6 the photo. Indeed, there were no spots on Roy's head)

Birby6: Son of a Goomba, he's right!

Larry: Have I ever been wrong?

Eyeless Goomba: Well, there was that time you…

Larry: DON'T REMIND ME!

Birby6: Well, I think we have enough evidence, and I know just who did it! Drum roll please!

(A drum rolls by him)

Blueytroopa: At least that joke didn't die.

Birby6: The perpetrator is…

(He points to someone trying to sneak out of the door, which birby6 locks)

Everyone: …

Popple: Well, aren't you going to say who it is?

Birby6: I could, but then it will ruin all the suspense I've built up!

Ella: JUST SAY IT ALREADY!

Birby6: FINE!

(He kicks the perpetrator in front of everyone. It's…)

Everyone except birby6: TOAD?

Birby6: Actually, it's not Toad…

(He takes the cap off of his head, revealing another one is underneath with pink spots, and a blonde hair sticking out)

Everyone except birby6: PRINCE MUSH?

Prince Mush: Yes, I did it. The Eyeless Goomba deserved it anyway.

Birby6: Why?

Prince Mush: He worked at the Glitz Pit once, and he became the most popular person there! He announced matches like a pro, and soon he was being paid a lot of money, even more that me! He needed to pay, so I dressed myself as Roy Koopa and got Ella to beat him up for me. Unfortunately, I must have missed the head portion of my costume, making me have spots on my head. Having the Eyeless Goomba sue Ella was good as well. That way, no one would suspect me. I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids and that dog!

Popple: Did you just call Popple, the Great Shadow Thief, a dog?

Prince Mush: Yes I did!

(Popple blasts him away with a bomb from his sack)

Birby6: Finally, we're done with this case. Now time for me to get down to that fast food place down the street!

(He scrams away. Everyone else goes too, including Popple)

Somewhere else…

Goombario: I hate this job.

(A clown comes by him and pelts him with a cream pie)

Goombario: Okay, I REALLY hate this job.

(A dumpster fall on him, and Gourmet Guy falls on him too)

Gourmet Guy: Wow, you really DID join the circus.

(Goombario makes a face at him)

**Woohoo, I was in a good mood, so I made this.**

**If any reviewers have a case they want to present between two other characters, feel free to put it in a review. Here's the form:**

**Case Name:**

**Characters (No OCs):**

**Problem:**

**I'll come up with the witnesses and jury. Who knows, one of your OCs might be a witness or part of the jury!**

**Birby6 out!**


End file.
